Unless you screw this recipe up royally, we will guarantee that your homemade pizza rolls are better than those microwave ones your unfit mother bought for you all through high school when you refused to eat anything else. Next week: how to make homemade Mountain Dew.
If you still haven’t figured out how to pop the top off a beer with pretty much any given object in the room, car, campsite, toolbox, furniture, etc., you should watch a few videos on Youtube & practice so you can finally earn your Man Badge. Or just go ahead and buy this slim little wallet that’ll carry your cards, cash, & also packs a stealth bottle opener.
Your neighbors sure are crafty, with their cruelty-free beekeeping & the organic herb garden they never shut up about. But when you ferment your first batch of homemade mead (that ancient honey wine consumed by dragon-slaying knights in the middle ages) you’ll be the new champion of Who’s Craftiest. This kit includes everything you need to make 5 1-gallon batches.
Having no clue what to eat for breakfast is how you end up not and then you’re starving to death by like 10:30. So, if you’re down for eggs and spicy sausage, here’s a solution to your cluelessness. It’s called a recipe. Follow it.
Shepherd’s pie is right up there with manfood classics like Sloppy Joes, hot wings, & the ubiquitous pizza slice. But this recipe takes things up a notch. Adding a dark, frothy Guinness to any meal is a good idea, so why not put some in your pie?
It’s fun to drain a growler of your favorite craft brew in one sitting but on the off chance that you want to save some for tomorrow, Drink Tank’s stainless steel vacuum-insulated growler bottles will keep your beer cold, carbonated, & fresh for up to 24 hours. The Keg Tap Cap lets you tap it like a real keg you can take anywhere.
To women, “superfoods” are things like kale and quinoa. Yeah, right. Superfoods to us come wrapped in bacon, stacked with cheese & deep-fried. Seriously, give her one bite of a pepperoni pizza potato skin and see if her definition of ‘super’ doesn’t change.
Normally flasks are designed to be stashed in a pocket or jammed in your boot for stealth boozing. Not this one. Handmade of gleaming 100% solid copper in the USA, it’s the kind of thing you’ll want to show off, so be prepared to share your whiskey.
Machined from heat-treated billet aluminum, the 1.5 oz. Muzzleshot is a shot glass designed to look like the Flash Hider on an M16 rifle. If you’ve had the experience of carrying one of these weapons into combat, you deserve a drink. Probably several. So here’s to you.
A pack of science lab lushes created a smartphone-controlled liquor-slinging robot that can accurately and efficiently mix hundreds of cocktails. We just hope this team of geniuses didn’t forget to make the robot a good listener and a heavy-handed pourer. And what about tips?
