The James Bond film franchise is turning 50. To celebrate this anniversary they’re releasing a commemorative 007 cologne. If you want to smell like an aging spy, the heady blend of apple, cardamom, sandalwood, and vetiver is sure to lure in cougars from all the way across the room. Available exclusively at Harrods of London on August 15 and nationwide September 19.

Women don’t eat musk or pinecones or any of the other stuff that men’s cologne is made to smell like. But many of them eat meat. That’s why a little spritz of this barbecue scented cologne could reel them right in. What red-blooded female won’t swoon at the smoky, fleshy essence of grilled meat? Spray some on your carcass and find out.

For the most part, having a beard is all fun & games. Until it starts stinking. You know, the real raunchy beard-stank you get after a brutal workout or a long day at the mattress factory? Sort of smells like Indian food and fungus? You never noticed it? Really? Well, other people definitely have. Maybe now is a good time to get some all-natural cedarwood beard oil.

It looks alarmingly like a real, police-issue .38 revolver – but have no fear, it’s just a Gun Soap – so safe, it even made the Today Show. This novelty soap is vegan friendly, scented with Black Tea & comes in gift packs of three. It makes a great joke gift for just about everyone on your list – but don’t even try to mail this to your brother in the State Pen.

Christopher Brosius has been called one of the most innovative perfumers of the 21st century. Yet, like most of us, he hates perfume. Instead of fruity mall store concoctions, CB’s scents smell good and honest. Simple. Nobody with taste wants to smell like some Guido-gone-clubbing. We want something manly. Scents like North Atlantic or Burnt Wood, odors subtly accentuating our hygiene…not masking our lack of it.

Every fragrance has a story.  Creed’s Windsor Cologne was created in 1936 for England’s King Edward VIII.  Yeah, the guy who forfeited the throne for some American tail. Each limited edition, shatterproof, leather-wrapped bottle is numbered and signed by it’s creator.  Wearing this won’t transform you into the Duke of Windsor, but it might give you an edge over your brethren.